Mized Bizness by Beck
by gundamgirl88
Summary: er...has some adult topics... um, almost everyone is bashed, well, in their own way. Duo is pretty much tortured. Um, the monkey....duo wearing a shark fin...we find the truth about dorothy....big sheets of glass...mistletoe...horse troughs...^_^;;;


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Woo-hoo! I'm on a role with this whole songfic thing!! Go me, go me!! I know, I know, you can go see the shrine in a couple months, those Egyptians take their time! OH! And I should have another part of "Go for it" up sometime this weekend! It was just really hard figuring out how I wanted to continue. There were a couple ideas I had, and I had to choose. ::sigh:: anyway, it's diner time soon, so I have to go!

Disclaimer: My site is WAY updated!! PLEASE go check it out!! http://www.geocities.com/alioop108

Mixed Bizness by Beck

  
I'm mixing business with leather

All the crew comes out wearing Gap Leather

Duo: Gap, all right! Hilde, we're living the high life now!

All: yeah ya are…

  
Christmas with Heather

Duo, our little match-maker, comes out from some odd room to Heero and Relena, and holds up mistletoe

Duo: Hey, Heero, ol' buddy, ol' pal, guess what?

Heero: looks up What about it?

Duo: Aw, come on! It's mistletoe! You gotta kiss now!!

Heero: takes out gun and shoots Mistletoe No

Duo: er…okay…slowly backs away into shadows

As soon as Duo leaves, we see Heero grab Relena and kiss her senseless

Relena: Wow Heero, and it's only July…

Heero: DAMN YOU DUO!!!!

  
Freaks flock together

Dorothy tarred and feathered, has a can up to her eyebrow which is currently being used as a can opener.(her eyebrow, that is)

Duo: comes on stage HAHA! FREAK!!

Dorothy: presses button on wrist and eyebrow grows into VERY big dagger DUO!!!! ODE TO JOY AND FREEDOM!!!!(AN: Doesn't that sound like a war cry of some sort? I think so)

  
And make all the g-boys scream

G-boys scream  
  
All right

duo and Hilde going a little overboard with the monkey dance

  
Turn it up now

Quatre and Dorothy come on, both wearing pixie costumes. Dorothy is sitting and sulking while burning her wand, while Quatre is having the time of his life

  
All right

Wufei comes out wearing "gangsta" clothes and starts breakdancing

  
Turn it up now

Trowa and Midii come out, doing the Tango. Trowa has a rose in his mouth while Midii is swooning  
  
Word up to the manthing

Wufei: I am a man!

All: sure ya are….

  
She's always cold lamping

A lot of lamps are scattered around, Duo is pole dancing crudely

All: AHHHHHH!!!! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!

only Hilde stays

Hilde: does a little meow cat thing 

  
Visine at the canteen

Wufei, always the nature man, is bathing in a horse trough

Heero walks up to it humming a death theme song and wearing a bathrobe and holding a scrubber and rubber ducky

They make eye-contact

Wufei: WAIT YOU TURN WOMAN!!

Heero: takes out gun I think it IS my turn.

Wufei: grumble….grumble…fumble….

Heero: gets in trough and begins humming funeral song once again

I just wanna watch you dance

Duo is at one of those "adult bookstores" and is waiting for the wall thing to go down so he can look through the glass at the "dancing women"

Hilde: DUO!!!!!!!

Duo: EEP!!!!starts running

the screen goes down and we see Quatre sprawled in a chair wearing a pair of boxers

Quatre: whimpers  
  
Do you wanna ride on the Baltic Sea

Relena and Heero are doing that little wave thing with their hands. The rest of the crew are holding up fake wooden waves and "rolling" them in front and behind of the couple. Duo stands up next to Heero and Relena wearing goggles, snorkel and a shark fin and flashes a huge grin

I'll be your mistress C.O.D.

Relena is pushing Heero slowly backwards with her index finger, smiling seductively at him, and he slowly shrinks backwards, smiling seductively back at her

  
I'll comb your hair

Sally attempts to comb Wufei's hair

Wufei: NOT SO HARD WOMAN!!!!

Sally: I HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED WUFEI!!!!

Wufei: …oh

  
Re-write your diary

Trowa is reciting poetry to someone we can't see

As we pan out, we see he is reciting to…A ROCK?!

Midii comes up behind him and pokes him on the shoulder

Midii: eh-HEM.

Trowa: pales my rock…

  
Pour champagne on a honey bee

Duo, obviously drunk, begins to eat bees and drink more alcohol

Hilde: DUO!!

Duo: yeah babe?

Hilde: …Save some for me!

people from the "nice place" wearing white and carrying a straightjacket come and take Duo away for eating bee's

Duo: Yes!!! I heard about this place from my ol' man!! You get totally cool padded walls that you can lick and they taste lick air freshener!! Sorry, Hilde! Better luck next time!

Hilde: Aw man! Lucky dog!

  
She can really do me

We see a steamed up window and suddenly a hand presses against it (think that one nasty scene from titanic. (gosh I dislike that movie))

Duo: appears out of no where Aw Heero's getting lucky!!

duo chuckles and walks away

inside Sauna(YES SAUNA!)

Relena: Turn the heater OFF Heero!! I CAN'T BREATHE!!

Heero: I'M TRYING RELENA, BUT I BROKE OFF THE KNOB!!!

Relena: AHH! THE DOOR'S LOCKED HEERO!!

Heero and Relena proceed to bang on glass repeatedly

  
She can look right through me

Crew dancing in between large plates of glass

Duo: Hey! I can see right through the—

Glass shatters

People scream

Duo: ^_^;;;;; eh…oops?

Wufei comes out from behind a sheet still standing wearing VERY thick glasses

Wufei: like Jan from brady bunch I CAN'T FIND MY CONTACT LENSE!!

Duo: HAHA! GEEK!

Sally jumps out of subspace and beats Duo to a bloody pulp

Duo:…help…

  
And make all the g-boys scream

g-boys scream

  
I'm mixing fitness with leather

The crew is wearing aerobic outfits from the 80's, leggings, body-suits, tube socks, all in er…very neon colors. And then leather jackets on top

Quatre: You know, I think I'm really getting the hang of this spilt thing!!

Annoying tv guy: appears out of no where That's right Quatre, and with this handy dandy video, "Quatre's Quadriceps of steel" for only 59. 95, you can do anything from your wildest dreams!

Duo: Ya mean I can really drink all that stuff under the sink without having to get a new stomach and then go over the rainbow with my little pony and meet Tyra Banks in a bikini?!

Tv guy: um…ok… 

  
Homework with Heather

Heero is staring at a huge pile of homework SLOWLY burning(An: THANK YOU HEERO!!!!)

Relena: Heero, have you seen the…doc…u…ment….I HAVE BEEN WORKING FOREVER ON!!!!!!!

Heero:whimpers

Relena suddenly jumps over to bonfire

Relena: chanting Die, Homework, DIE!!! I HOPE YOU BURN IN THE FIREY PITS OF HE-

Heero covers her mouth with hand and sweatdrops

All: _real_ peaceful, huh?

  
Freaks flock together

Duo and Hilde wearing chicken feathers and mass amounts of tar start swimming on the ground as if they are flying

Hilde: This ground thing will be edited out, right?

Gundamgirl88: er…

  
And make all the lesbians scream

Music cuts out, and we have a close up of Dorothy's face

Dorothy: Looks around WHAT?!

Pan out to see the rest of the crew sweatdropping and looking at her expectantly

All: heh…heh…backs away slowly  
  
All right

the ENTIRE g-crew is doing the monkey

  
Turn it up now

Crew doing hitchhiker things and dancing around

  
All right

gundams come on and start doing the monkey in background

  
Turn it up now

All strike charlie's angels poses

Done. Was it funny? No? Yeah, I know, hey! I tried! Anyway, PLEASE go check out my website, http://www.geocities.com/alioop108


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